Why do we resist change? (And what to do about it)
When change comes along our usual first reaction is to resist. Even when we say we want it, new job, healthier habits, launching that creative project, a career change, something inside us slams the brakes and says ‘nooo’.
So... why do we resist change, even when we want it?
Two people I turn to when thinking about this are John Kotter and Steven Pressfield. They’ve got very different vibes, one’s Harvard Business School, the other writes like a warrior-poet but together, they crack open what resistance is really about.
John Kotter: The Organisational Side of Resistance
John Kotter is big in the world of leadership and change. In Leading Change, he talks about how even brilliant plans can fail if we don’t deal with resistance early and often.
Here’s why people often push back against change:
They don’t feel the urgency – “Why fix it if it’s not that broken?”
They fear the unknown – What if this new thing fails?
They’re not involved – If change is done to people instead of with them, expect resistance.
They’ve seen it flop before – Cue the eye-roll: “Here we go again…”
“People don’t change because you tell them to. They change because they feel they must.” – John Kotter
Have you ever resisted change at work just because it felt top-down or rushed? Or maybe you don’t even know you are resisting. Maybe it’s more of an avoidance. A denial. You label it, whatever it is that is making you dodge the inevitable. Often it’s based on past experiences. But that’s the issue. That doesn’t mean that the past will repeat itself. Or it is the fear of the unknown. If we can move ourselves into ap lace of needing the change, acknowledging that it could be a better place to be, get curious about what the change might hold for you, the the resistance starts to fade.
Steven Pressfield: The Inner Battle
And that brings us to this wrestle inside of us. Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art takes a more personal, creative angle. He says resistance is that voice in your head whispering:
“You’re not ready.”
“You’re not good enough.”
“You can do it tomorrow…”
He defines resistance as:
Fear in disguise – Procrastination, perfectionism, endless “research”
A shape-shifter – It shows up as Netflix binges, scrolling, or busywork
A sign you’re onto something – The stronger the resistance, the more important the work
“Resistance will tell you anything to keep you from doing your work. It will perjure, fabricate; it will seduce you. Resistance is always lying and always full of [it].” – Steven Pressfield
What’s one project you’ve been “meaning to start” for way too long? Be honest—what’s holding you back? Do you have those rumbling thoughts tumbling around in your head. Think about what is really underneath the resistance.
And think about what happens if the Resistance wins!
Resistance is a signal
Whether it’s personal or professional, resistance is part of the game of change. But it’s not a stop sign, it’s a signal.
Here’s how to push through:
Acknowledge it – Don’t ignore resistance. Name it.
Break it down – Small steps, small wins = momentum.
Stay consistent – Show up, even when it’s uncomfortable and you don’ want to.
Get others involved – We resist less when we feel supported.
Get on with it - resistance won’t go away, you need to do it despite it.
What would change if you treated resistance not as an enemy, but as a compass pointing to the work that matters most?